I get teased a lot for my passion, my enthusiasm, and my boundless energy. I get it. I am a force. I recognize that about myself. Many years ago I stopped trying to quiet my personality or to dampen my outgoing nature. It wasn’t easy. I had been shamed by many. I was told I needed to change.
I don’t know if, when I was little, people were trying to change me because I was a girl, but I remember thinking why don’t they ever tell the boys to be quiet?
As an adult woman, I still feel that it is expected, at times, for me to “wait my turn”, to sit still and be quiet, or to be demure.
When I first started therapy 11 years ago, I was in crisis. I was facing seemingly insurmountable challenges. Turns out I was going to be just fine.
I stayed in therapy, and I still value it to this day. I have spent many sessions on self acceptance. Countless journal entries, talks, and reading and writing exercises learning about myself. It is hard when you have been teased and criticized about your core nature and personality.
I know we all do it to each other more often than we realize. I hope I seldom unwittingly hurt someone because of my jokes. I know I have in the past, and for those times I am deeply sorry. And, when I make the mistake in the future, I will apologize and ask for forgiveness.
At 47 years old, I am ready to stop apologizing and to start celebrating. My enthusiasm comes from a deep passion for love, acceptance, creativity and justice. It was how I was built. I am a force. I am proud. I am Casey.
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I do like this blog. Way to go. Acceptance in a funny thing but it will set you free.
Baby steps…heehee!
Thanks for posting this Casey, took guts.
Thank you Nancy. I appreciate that you recognized that is took a bit of risk taking to be honest and put myself out there. It may surprise some people that folks like me experience self doubt too. Keep on being YOU. You are fab!
you are a force. an admirable one. i am honored to be in the path of that force someplace along the way. you add to every life you touch. march on sister !
Thanks Rachelle…you are very kind. Thank you for embracing everyone!
You are one of my very favorite forces!! You are a beacon of light and love and empowerment for all of us lucky enough to be around you. This is a wonderful reminder to all of us! XO
Julie
You inspire me with your vibrant love of life. I am so blessed to live with your art every day. Keep creating. We could all use more color and inspiration in our lives.
can i add “and talking to friends until way too late,” to that list of “therapy?”
all of which, i wouldn’t change for a million dollars.
ok, maybe i would for a million, ’cause that would help us both right now.
I think it is safe to say that late talks with friends cause most therapists to want to scream. I don’t think they like hearing “late night” since they often remind people to get enough sleep. And, I am pretty sure they don’t like having untrained people playing “backseat therapist” with their clients. But, I have no doubt that they like knowing that people have incredibly support friends that love and care for each other. That they LOVE!
I am one lucky woman to have you as my friend. I will make sure to write that in the “gratitude journal” again tonight. Right after I start a “gratitude journal”. I am sure my therapist will be thrilled.
hugs and kisses.
Happy to get the benefit of your energy and enthusiasm! You are a force in a good way, and I hope we are teaching our Scouts how to be a force as well.
Thanks Jessica. I love co-leading together. It brings my life joy. Thanks for being such an accepting friend.
This journey to live your best life and be your best you is not for the faint of heart! Great share, and I think world needs more enthusiasm and brave, self-acceptance women so keep it up!
Thank you so much for your comment. It means so much to me. Authenticity is always my goal, sometimes it is easy and sometimes it takes work. Let the journey continue…