I was frustrated last night. Angry frustrated. I wanted to walk in a charity walk with my Dad, and everything in my life conspired against me all afternoon and into the evening. When I called him to finally tell him I just wasn’t going to make it, I got my stepmom on the phone. My voice broke when admitting I wasn’t going to make it. I didn’t have a pity party, but I did throw a private hissy fit. It went something like this:
Why is this city getting so big and busy that I can’t get to Corporate Woods in 20 minutes at the end of rush hour?
Why would a charity hold an event on a Friday night and have it begin at 6:30? Don’t they know people own businesses that don’t close at 5pm?
Why did I have a child? Didn’t I know he would grow up and have a busy life and need rides?
Why did I marry a man who is always busy with his own small business?
Why can’t I just do what I want to do and not have so many people demanding so much of me? Don’t they know I just want to walk in the dark with my Dad and remember his incredible journey through cancer? Don’t they know I want to hold a delicately glowing balloon in the quiet of a wooded suburban setting?
Then the moon came out. The biggest, most beautiful moon of the year so far. By that time of my night, I was back at my business sneaking in a few important tasks between car rides for my young man. I stepped out into our back alley to get something out of the car and was blown away by the brightness of the night sky. Then I saw the monster moon. I turned, locked the door to the store, and walked around the block.
Quietly. Slowly. In the glowing night. By myself. And, in every way, my Dad was there with me while I quickly put the hissy fit to bed.
p.s. At the end of the evening, I realized I was where I was supposed to be last night. When my final pick-up of the golden child occurred, the first thing he said to me was, “Mom, did you see that moon?” I told him that indeed I had and that I had bathed in her amazing powers. That’s when I got the look that only a sixteen year old can grant.
p.p.s. I know you’ve been humming The Stones while you read this. That makes me smile!
SHARE THIS: 
Wonderful blog, Sloane! I feel so peaceful. Just what I needed tonight. Thank you!
Wonderful blog, Sloane! I feel so peaceful. Just what I needed tonight. Thanks!
A full moon always lifts my spirits! Magical!
Oh, Sloane, I have tears in my eyes, darn it.
thank you for perspective…have had a few pity parties and hissy fits my ownself lately. beautiful way to find center.