My husband has a unique name: Harl A. Van Deursen. When we married, I did not take his name. I liked my name just the way it was, and, to this day, he will tell you he wishes he had bucked the status quo and taken my name.
 |
 |
|
His unique name made for very interesting direct mail, and I started saving mailing labels 20 years ago from credit card companies and those just generally wanting us to commit to a product, sale or promotion. These labels still make me laugh out loud and, occasionally, I add a doozy to the binder clip. A general sampling:
Van Harl
Harl Harl Van
Carl Bandeursen
Harl Vandevresen
H. Van Van
Harz Van Dee
Reich Barl Van Deursen
Van Sloane Deursen
Lately I find myself keeping great spam email because sometimes I can’t stop laughing – not only at the subject line, but at the thought of who actually opens these missives from the ether. (I can assure you I don’t. They are safely locked in my special spam folder and are virtually untouched.) Most of the good ones are sex related, and please stop reading now if you are faint of heart.
My current subject line favorites:
ELECTtrifying bed-action
be her wild banger
Want a King banana down there?
BECOME A MATING CHAMPION!
Some magic for your wand.
Torpedo her ALL night
make your woody outstanding!!
Stress Cooling Lovemaking?
BANG Ladies Like Crazy
(All capitalization and punctuation has been left intact from the originals.)
Casey is a little fed up with my cackling, but she seldom fails to bite and ask, “What’s so funny?” Mass marketing hasn’t really changed that much with the advent of electronic mail. My husband and I knew not to give much heed to a company that not only didn’t know our names but mixed them liberally. And, as a heterosexual female, the spam I receive daily doesn’t warrant a click.
If you want to talk me into something, know a little bit about me. Now, that’s true marketing.
SHARE THIS: 
